Twilight is really, really scary.

Ok, I know I'm about 3 years behind the whole Twilight trend. I've been avoiding it...

Actually, that's not true. I tried to read the book about 4 times, and each time, I ended up putting it down. My fanatical friends told me to wait to get to "the meadow scene"---I'd for sure fall for Edward by then and be completely hooked.

Then I got to the meadow scene. And I still didn't get it.

Because here's the thing: vampires scare the *%@$ out of me. Even nice, cute ones who are vegetarians and whose skin sparkles like diamonds in the sunshine.

So last weekend, I decided to try the movie instead...even though I've never, ever liked a movie more than the book version. But maybe if I was staring at Robert Pattison instead of envisioning this scary vampire in my head, I'd get more into it.

Because Edward Cullen is really hot. (I know, duh.) And my sister in law is right, the way he talks to and looks at Bella is captivating.

And actually, I was kind of enjoying it. Until another meadow scene.

This one involving a baseball game. 

 

And the scary tracker vampire. 

By the time he got to Bella's mom's house, I had to turn it off.

And the tracker has been visiting me in my dreams ever since.

My vivid, unreal, wake up thinking "omg, was that real?" pregnant dreams.

And in my dreams, he is tracking my unborn child.

So, I've decided that Edward and I are not meant to be. It's not you...it's me. And the fact that now I'm laying awake at night, wondering if vampires really could exist.

I know that's absurd. But it's still scary.

SIDE NOTE: While we're talking about movies, let's talk about my girl crush, Kate.

I'm really, really sad about her divorce. I sort of feel like it's an actual friend of mine splitting up with their forever person.  I mentioned this at work yesterday and everyone in my pod looked at me like I had 3 heads.

I mean, what?? That's totally normal, right?

Riiiiight.